Grimlock ♥ Ultra Magnus

My mom insists the old, old bed frame that I'd collaged up was broken.   Or she did right after the new one had actually fallen apart - or y'know, really, actually broken.   

Mom: "I don't know how you broke it."

Me: "Well, I was really fat back then..."

There's this long pause, and then she starts chortling. 

Mom: "You were.   You were so fat."

That diffused the situation quite nicely without it devolving  into a fight.   People are horrified by this story.  I find it hilarious.   I called myself fat first, my weight had on bearing on how much she loved me (but being a good MD, she got nervous about my weight and health issues, and that's all she cared about), and I think she felt she could say it because of the 'were' issue.   (I'm no longer that fat.)