Grimlock ♥ Ultra Magnus

The Loki plotline alone was so, so bad.   Loki pretends to be Deadpool's father to try and trick him.   Which doesn't work and only resolves in the fact that Loki gives Deadpool Thom Cruz's face. 

Deadpool, who hits on everything breathing, decides this is in fact awful and that he looks like a dandy movie star - and yes, he says dandy.   And yes, Deadpool would have to mock himself ruthlessly for saying 'dandy' when he's properly written. 

Anyway, it's so bad, and he misses the scars that define him so badly that he will do anything, including deep free his face to free himself from the horrible, horrible burden of being movie-star handsome. 

Yes, I meant that he would literally try to deep fry his face. 

So, apparently, getting actual sex with a pretty face is a problem?  Look, if you're thinking, 'gee, I wish this made sense,' don't worry.  I wish it made sense, too. 

Also, apparently he was not into dudes. 

Or, y'know, he was trying to convince himself he wasn't.   (Also, this is why I know he wasn't saying he was a redhead earlier; he's clearly a brunette and was when he called Titania a redhead.   Although there was a reason for her being blonde, potentially.   Copycat!   Which was a really bad conclusion to one of an old plotline from the original mini-series.)

Even the breaking the fourth wall references were lame, especially compared to the brilliant ways that it's used later on.

I spent most of the time reading this like this: 

Shut up, voice in Deadpool's head.   I don't wanna pay attention.   These plots are stupid, critical or not.   

Only two and half more volumes of this hellish idiocy, then onto the better stuff.   Oh, Primus, please let Agent X be better...